Mission Failed, Load Last Save
by WolverinesDarlin
Summary: You can fail main missions, and you can basically fail Loyalty Missions, and you can fail the Collector Mission... what if you could fail the recruiting or the potentional recruits? That would suck. Slight Romance more friendship


_Ever wonder if you could fail the recruiting missions too? Not just the Loyalty missions or the Collector mission? I mean what if you failed one of your potential recruits?_

_Like if you failed to save Tali and the Geth got to her._

_Or you couldn't convince Jack to come._

_OR you failed to get the cure to the disease that Mordin was treating and he never left cause of it._

_Or what if Garrus didn't make it….._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Mass Effect_

_Slight Garrus and FemShep_

X.X.X.X

Shepard huffed and reloaded her shotgun while looking over her shoulder at the gun ship outside the window.

She ordered Miranda over to the left of the plant holder and Jacob to the right of a crate; she took point next to Garrus who was on her right. She ALWAYS took the left.

Garrus took cover next to her, the two of them practically sitting on the ground. Garrus sent her a tired but cocky look. "Just like old times huh Commander?" His mandibles flared in amusement.

Even with chaos all around them he managed to make her smile, "Yeah… just like old times." She winked and checked her shotgun before the two of them popped back up and started firing at the gunship again. Suddenly Jacob screamed in pain and fell to the ground.

"Jacob!" Miranda screamed and looked over to her right and stopped firing resulted in getting shot herself. She fell to the ground just as fast.

"Miranda! NO! Damn it Miranda…" Shepard screamed and opened her Omni tool to use the last of her medi gel when Garrus left her side and tried to move in closer.

Shepard immediately put her Omni tool away and pulled her assault rifle out to provide cover fire for the turian as he tried to get a better shot at the ship firing at them.

She was overly grateful she had pulled some shit with the mechanic so the repairs weren't completed; it gave them the advantage, however small.

"Shit! I'm reloading!" She popped back down under cover and hoped that Garrus had enough time to get cover as well. She popped the clip in and popped back out just in time to see him get riddled with bullets, but his shields protected him from most of the damage but she could see he was in pain and out of breath.

She should have known better than to think that Garrus would wait for his shields to recover before continuing.

He popped back out just as the occupants of the gunship fired a missile his way.

Garrus flew backwards and landed with a thud a few yards back, "Garrus!" She screamed.

Shepard wanted to turn around and help him but the gunship wasn't going to leave until all were down and dead which meant she wasn't getting to Garrus without getting shot at. Instead she spun back around and unloaded her assault rifle at the ship and when she was out of ammo she switched to her Carnifex.

She continued her onslaught of bullets until the ship finally lost all shields and fell out of the sky and to the ground far, far below.

Shepard sighed and almost laughed at her victory when she remembered why she was so mad at the ship and its occupants in the first place and why she had done it alone.

"Garrus…" She whispered and sun on her heel and ran to his prone body.

He was lying in a pool of blue blood and was unmoving, his hand still clutching his precious sniper rifle closely.

"Garrus?" She asked as she turned him over onto his back, his eyes flew open and he gasped for breath. "Garrus!"

"Shepard" He gasped.

"Hold on, you're gonna be okay…" She told him and turned to order the two Cerberus officers to radio the Normandy and call for help when she remembered they were still rendered unconscious. _Damnit_

"Is any of this real?" he asked her, blood spilling between his lips.

Shepard turned attention back to her longtime turian friend and furrowed her brows and nodded, "Yeah… yeah it's real."

"But you're dead… you died years ago." He winced and coughed.

Shepard laughed a little, "Yeah I did. Cerberus brought me back… it's kinda a long story."

Garrus swallowed hard. "I got time…." If he could, Shepard was certain he would have smirked at her.

Shepard grabbed his left hand in her own and squeezed hard. "How about we wait until after you're not bleeding all over the floor?"

Garrus laughed a little causing him pain and more blood to come up his throat and through his lips. "Damnit don't make me laugh…"

"Sorry…" She apologized and frowned at his pain.

She cursed Miranda for being so emotional on the battlefield. She had never expected the woman to be like that, especially not with a colleague.

She thought about finding a way to wake them back up when she remembered she hadn't used the last of the medi gel yet and got excited at the idea and opened her Omni tool and applied the medi gel.

The bleeding didn't even slow, _why won't he stop bleeding? _

Shepard shook her head, "I have to call in back up…" She touched her earpiece, "Joker this is Shepard, get Chakwas down on our position now, Garrus is hit bad."

"_Garrus?"_

"Joker not now, just get help here now!" She ordered the cocky pilot.

"_Alright alright." _Joker said and Shepard severed the connection.

"Garrus, help is on the way but I need to try to find some more medi gel…" She started to stand up to look for a medical kit or pack somewhere but he held onto her hand and kept her on the floor next to him.

"No… stay." Garrus swallowed hard again. "I… I missed you Shepard. Nothing was right in the galaxy without you. I want you here… at the… at the end."

Shepard shook her head and held his hand close to her chest, "Garrus no… this can't be the end. I need you here. I need you to have my back Garrus! I need you to be behind me during this." She calmed down and spoke softly, "This can't be the end… I need you."

Garrus looked at her pathetically, but his breathing had evened, "Let me get you help Garrus…" She tried.

Garrus closed his eyes and started to breath deep; Shepard sighed and put her right hand, the hand that wasn't holding his, on the side of his face, the side that wasn't half blown off. "Garrus… don't leave me."

"I'm sorry Shepard… hope you can forgive me for shooting you…" Garrus opened his eyes for a moment to make eye contact but closed them again soon after.

Shepard laughed, "I wasn't gonna bring it up…" she rubbed her thumb up and down his mandible.

"Always such a paragon…"

"I just choose my battles, something you never picked up."

Garrus' body shook when he chuckled quietly. "Damn it Shepard, I told you not to make me laugh." He said as he coughed up more blood, his warm dark blood staining her hand and made the tears that had been threatening to fall spill over; she was grateful his eyes were closed.

"Oh god Garrus, don't die… please don't die."

"It was just like old times…" he said quietly.

She nodded and did her best to talk around the lump in her throat, "Yes it was…"

Garrus nodded as well, "Thanks Commander… for coming back." He opened his eyes again and for a moment and seemed surprised to see her tears but didn't say anything.

"Couldn't leave you alone too long… I knew you'd get in trouble." She smiled weakly.

Garrus laughed again, but this time didn't wince. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."

She gave him a playful wink, trying to keep things interesting enough for him to stay in the conversation as they waited for help. "I always have your back Garrus… always will."

Garrus nodded, "I know… and I'll always have yours."

Shepard smiled but it was replaced by a frown when his breathing became erratic and uneven. Blood started to come back up his throat and spilled over his lips and he failed to get in another healthy breath. His grip on her hand became one of iron, she felt three of her fingers break under the pressure but did nothing to remove her hand from his grip as he struggled to breathe and hold onto life.

"Hold on Garrus, just hold on…" She whispered.

X.X.X.X

Shepard looked up at Chakwas as the doctor did her best to keep Garrus alive.

Shepard sighed and looked back to her dying friend. She raised her hand to his fringe and started to stroke it gently. Garrus looked at her a moment and then closed his eyes grabbing her free hand with his.

"Come on Garrus… stay with me."

Garrus was one of Shepard's closest friends. And she really only had four; Garrus, Tali, Joker, and Anderson.

But out of all of them she trusted him above all of them. She trusted him with her life, she knew that if she was to hand him a gun and go into any fight he would have her back 100%. Garrus listened to what she thought, he talked to her and trusted her.

Over the few years they had known each other they had become close.

They needed each other.

They were ALWAYS there for each other she couldn't imagine taking on Saren without him and she couldn't imagine going this Cerberus trip alone. She needed someone she could trust out there on the battlefield and she knew she needed Garrus to do that. Without him this was going to be impossible to do.

Shepard looked over her shoulder to see Miranda and Jacob sitting next to them, Jacob looking rather pathetic from being in pain, tired, and feeling bad that the mission went south.

Miranda just stared at Shepard, her face expressionless. Shepard held back her sneer but that didn't change the boiling anger inside.

The shuttle lurched as they came into the Normandy and Chakwas sprung into action. She and a couple other crew members; including Mordin, grabbed the gurney that Garrus was laying on and pushed him out of the hangar and up to the infirmary.

Shepard followed them up but stopped when they got up to the door to the infirmary and watched as the door closed in front of her, separating her from her best friend.

Shepard turned around when she heard someone come up behind her.

"Shepard… I'm sorry about the turian, I got-"

"Stupid. You got STUPID." Shepard yelled. "How could you let your emotions get a hold of you like that? Garrus could DIE because you decided to get all mushy of Jacob again!"

"Shepard I just wanted to apologize. But if you think that *I* had ANYTHI-"

"Just shut up!" Shepard shouted this caused her new biotics to flare. She wasn't used to them and therefore wasn't sure how she was supposed to control them.

"Shepard calm down, now YOU are getting emotional and there is no need. Not to mention he's a turian…"

"No need? My friend; who HAS a name by the way and it's Garrus. I expect you to remember that, was shot by a gunship and is currently in surgery. He could DIE! At least I waited until the threat was dealt with before *I* got emotional." Her lips curled and she made fists with her hands, her body glowing blue with her uncontrolled temper.

"Two can play this game Shepard." Miranda said, bringing her own biotics down into her hands.

Shepard brought her hands up and stared at them. Trying to get the biotic power to shut off to make it end but she couldn't.

Suddenly Miranda stopped, and looked rather calm. "Shepard, what happened to your hand?"

Shepard's anger seemed to melt as she realized her hand was pretty beat up. Three of her fingers; middle, ring, and pinky were all broken.

She remembered that Garrus had held her hand so tight that he had broken her fingers. She almost wanted to laugh but it wasn't funny.

"Garrus has a tight grip." She mumbled.

"We should get that fixed." Miranda said clearly and in a very authoritive voice.

"I don't know if you forgot but the doctor is kinda busy right now." Shepard said in an irritated voice and quirked an eyebrow at her.

She looked around the deck for the first time, it was completely empty. Shepard silently wondered why nobody was up on the deck, and just assumed they were all in the quarters while Garrus was performed on, or maybe working on CIC deck or Engineering.

"Yeah but Shepard, you need to get that fixed."

"Later." Shepard said in a voice that said that decision was final and started to walk away but stopped half way back to the elevator she stopped and looked at Miranda. "For the record; this is your fault."

The look of discomfort and disgust crossed over Miranda's face and Shepard couldn't help but smirk as she turned back around and went up to her Cabin.

X.X.X.X

Shepard sighed as she entered the empty and un-familiar room. There was an empty fish tank a random glass case in the middle of the room it separated the office area from the bedroom area and there were pegs in the case, she assumed it was some sort of model case… thing.

This room was not hers and she hated it. She hated this ship, she hated this crew, she hated Miranda and she hated that Garrus was dying. Basically, she hated everything.

She walked over to the desk in front of her and grabbed a holo pad that was there, it had the list of dossiers of the people she was supposed to recruit none of which she was sure of, they were all some sort of mercenary or in Jack's case a psycho killer.

Shepard growled much like Garrus always did.

He used to growl every time he was talking about a sensitive topic. She would often joke that he sounded like a dog, Garrus was always torn between being offended and amused.

Shepard let out a frustrated scream at losing everything that mattered to her. She blamed Miranda for that. It was funny, it seemed that everything that went wrong pointed at the Cerberus lady.

She threw the holopad at the empty show case and felt better at seeing something shatter and hearing the destruction.

Most people would assume she would want some peace and quiet but hearing destruction almost made her feel better about life in general. She wanted to continue that feeling, it wasn't often she was able to feel that. Because when she was on a mission she wasn't allowed to relax, she had to focus.

She picked up another holopad and threw it against the wall and closed her eyes at listening it shatter on the wall.

Soon she went on a rampage just shoving things and throwing smaller objects.

She swiped at the computer console, shoving all things on the desk around it on the floor.

She ran to the bed and flipped the mattress over, she kicked at the desk and coffee table, she flipped all the couch cushions off and as her anger raised so did her biotic power which gave her more strength in destroying her room.

The ships AI, EDI, popped up on the pedestal and was about to ask her to stop but she threw a biotic throw her way and destroyed the panel.

She really hated this place and she blamed Miranda for all of it. Not Joker, Miranda.

She had made the decision to go back for Joker, and did not regret saving his life. Yes, Joker should have left long before it became that late, but she didn't blame him.

But she hated that Miranda had brought her back to a place where either her friends were uncontactable or were dead. She hated that Miranda brought her back to a place where her former life was utterly gone and none existent.

She threw the last thing that was untouched, a wine bottle and two wine glasses, against the wall; shattering them too.

Why they would put THOSE up there in the first place was beyond her.

Shepard let out an exasperated sigh and as her biotics faded as did her uncontrollable anger. She suddenly felt very tired and sat down on the cushion-less couch.

She rested her elbows on her knees and put her head in her hands and tried to remain calm now.

She prayed like Ashley had taught her once, praying for Garrus and his health. To make him better and not let him die.

She admitted in her prayer that she needed Garrus more than she needed anyone else.

She didn't even really know exactly why it was him she needed so bad. She just knew that she was closer to him then she was even to Kaiden when they were together. They just had this… bond.

They supported each other and had each other's back, always did. She kept his temper in check and he was the reasonable side of her, kinda like the little voice in her head that helped her make the right choice.

Sure he was always reckless in a sense but he had the right idea, he had a good heart.

She muttered one last silent prayer that he would be okay before her comm. in her room crackled to life and she rose her head from her hands and listened as Joker's voice filled the room.

"Uh, Commander… Jacob would like to talk to you in the debriefing room…" He said in a bit too quiet voice for Joker. Something wasn't right, she just knew it.

Shepard looked up at the ceiling, "Can it wait Joker?"

"It's about Garrus…"

Shepard's eyes widened and she sighed, "Alright, I'll be right down, thanks Joker."

The comm. went silent and she stood up slowly.

She walked through the mess and to the elevator and went down.

The walk to the debriefing room was like watching a movie, people sending her sympathetic looks, as she walked slowly through CIC and into the Armory.

She knew something was wrong and she hated the feeling, not to mention her broken hand was starting to throb now that the adrenaline was gone and THAT in itself was annoying.

She opened the door to see Jacob standing at the table looking rather disoriented and disconnecting to the world.

"Mister Taylor…?"

She said as the door closed behind her.

"Commander…" He looked at her pathetically.

Shepard didn't say anything, instead she just waited anxiously to hear the news on her best friend.

"We did what we could… but he was very… we… Commander…"

"Damnit Taylor! Just say it!"

Jacob looked down at the floor before he looked back up at her, "He didn't make it Shepard. We lost him."

Shepard stared at him for a fraction of a second before she flew through through the doors and back up to the crews deck where the infirmary was, the elevator couldn't move fast enough.

The crew was back up on the deck and when Shepard ran through the mess hall they all stared after her.

Shepard walked in just as Chakwas was finishing covering him up the white sheet covimg his still body.

"Doc…." Shepard started, her voice quiet and hoarse; the fact that it was her voice surprised even her.

"Commander…" The good doctor looked forelorn and sincerely sorry. "I'm so sorry."

"Why…?"

The doctor looked confused for a moment before answering, "Commander he was my frien-"

She stopped when she saw she wasn't even talking to her anymore, she was talking to herself or Garrus she couldn't be sure.

Shepard was staring at the covered body of her best friend looking worse than when she had when she had lost Wiliams.

Shepard slowly started to walk up to the table tears rising to the surface and preparing to fall.

Chakwas sighed a little bit before leaving the room to go clean up and enjoy the company of others, she needed a distraction after losing another friend.

Shepard hardly noticed that Chakwas had left or the sound of the door swishing open and closed she was completely focused on making it to Garrus' side.

"Why Garrus? Why couldn't you have just waited ONE more second? Why couldn't you have just… why did you have to die?" She asked all these questions as she prepared to pull the clean white sheet away.

When she finally did it was enough to break her right then and there. She let out a small sob as the tears broke loose and she repeated, "Why?"

Why did Archangel HAVE to be Garrus? Why was he at Omega in the first place? He was supposed to be back at the Citadel as a Spector. Why was he in that situation? Why did Miranda have to bring her back to this pain? Why was Miranda such a… Shepard shook her head and sighed; all these thoughts running through her head was making her sick.

She stared at Garrus and sighed as she stroked his fringe.

She lost her best friend today… and it was all Cerberus' fault. When this whole collector buisness was over she was going to destroy the organization from the inside out, starting with Miranda and The Illusive Man.

X.X.X.X

_Review and tell me what ya think, I personally don't care for it. Just let me know. Thanks!_


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